Coulda, Woulda, Shoulda (but don't really care that I didn't)

As I scurried around the kitchen yesterday afternoon, finishing off some soggy chicken nuggets and cold macaroni and cheese, I started daydreaming about life before kids. 

Before ravenous toddlers depleted the coveted leftover supply and crying babies forever separated me from my precious couch. 

When breaded chicken cutlets were the norm and frozen chicken nuggets were lost in the ever-so-processed-I-would-never-touch-that section of the grocery store (although I must say the microwaved chicken nugget is really growing on me).

In a time when I viewed eating as a sacred art of relaxation and not an athletic competition.

Lost in reverie I wondered what advice I would give a couple in their pre-baby-making years...

Just then my toddler stormed the kitchen demanding "Mat, geen" (translation: milk in his green cup... the only cup he will drink from after seeing Elmo Goes Green).  The baby crossed the line from moderately whiny to full-blown screaming get-me-to-bed-right now mode, and my reverie screeched to a halt.

I had just read about this Time Out for Theta Mom Thursday, where once a month you say good-bye the the kids and take an hour for yourself. 



So when my husband arrived home I left him with two kids and a vague dinner plan, then jetted to the local Starbucks to cotinue my daydream.  Of course 10 minutes later, laptop and coffee in hand and not a single seat to be found, I drearily loped to my car and with all the martyrdom I could muster called my husband, declaring mommy time was just not meant to be. 

Upon his encouragement, however, I took my coffee to the library (I know, I'm a rule-breaker), found a quiet corner, and summoned a list of childless pleasures I took for granted before, well, children!

I am not an advisey kind of person, so I would never actually say this to someone, but this is my blog, so here is what I came up with... (I should probably preface this by saying that I wouldn't go back to my days before kids for anything.  Life is crazy now, but I absolutely love it.  Having said that, a girl can dream...)

1. Sleep in every weekend, even if it means putting off housework, neglecting errands, or completely ignoring your early-bird husband and his nasty lectures on the perils of wasting your day sleeping.
2. Enjoy cooking.  Drink red wine and listen to music.  Make something fancy and elaborate at least once a week.
3. After dinner go to your local coffeeshop for dessert.
4. Turn off the TV, sit on your couch, and enjoy the precious sound of quiet.
5. Have some friends over and enjoy being as loud as you want without worrying about waking the baby and spending the rest of the night nursing him back to sleep.
6. Get busy in the middle of the afternoon before you're both too tired (who am I kidding... in five years I don't think my husband was ever "too tired").
7. Go away for the weekend with the girls (or guys).  Drink wine, play games, and giggle the days away (okay, that part is not meant for the guys... that would be weird.  Please don't do that if you're a guy).
8. Travel abroad, for either short or extended periods.
9. Take off work for no reason other than sitting on your butt with a hot cup of coffee and your good friends Regis and Kelly.
10. I'm actually slowing down on ideas here.  So... let me know what you think number ten should be!

* A big thank you to Theta Mom for the encouragement to get out of the house and away from all things kids... it really was refreshing!